Carolyn’s Diary Entry #2: Preventing the Madness

It’s easy to let the complete overhaul in routine get to you after a while. I mean – of course – I’m not complaining about the lack of work-related stress or the ability to get enough sleep every night. Those parts of this life are amazing! But certainly there are downsides. And some of the greatest downsides are related to a lack of productivity. Truly, I think all people want to feel like they are living purposeful lives. Daniel certainly does. His continual quest for meaning can drive me up a wall sometimes – as most of you who know us well can attest to. But I, too, can buckle under a lack of purpose. I can only cook so many meals…wash so many loads of laundry…study so many Romanian verb conjugations…have coffee with so many people before I start to question, “What the heck am I doing here in Moldova?!” And then comes the even scarier question: “What the heck am I doing on Earth???!”

The problem is that the question of meaning is pretty much life’s biggest question. There is NO WAY we will have this figured out at age 31 or 33 or even 83. Just because Daniel and I may have more time to contemplate it while in Moldova does not mean that we will come out the other side of this year with THE answer. So when I feel myself descending into madness over the questions of “why” and “to what end” and “how can I…”, that is when I get myself outside. It’s amazing how leaving the four walls of your workspace or your home and venturing into the outdoors can liberate your mind as well as your body. Here are some pictures of us avoiding madness by being outside in the Chișinău winter:

Of course, we are still asking ourselves a ton of tough questions about what we want for this year abroad and for the years after that. We have conflicted feelings about the work we are doing now…and that has led to a lot of interesting and heated discussions between the two of us. I’m sure we’ll be posting more about some of those deep thoughts in the future as we refine them and work through them. At this point in time, though, rest assured that we are not entirely crazy or frustrated or confused. At least we don’t think so. [I’m pretty sure it’s been said that the crazy person has no idea that they are crazy.] Feel free to message us or email us to check in on the crazy level over here. We love and appreciate you guys for sticking with us on this journey.